The best kept secrets for adult dating pdf
The great wonder of middle age is that we know our time is now limited.
It is possible to maintain a happy sex-life for decades with the same person.But if you can exercise forgiveness in small ways at the start of a love affair then you’re more likely to find ways to forgive the bigger hurts and transgressions, if and when they happen. There are good rows and bad rows but make no mistake – everybody argues.Ridiculing or humiliating each other is not a good idea, or a good omen.Given silence in which to speak or rant, they’ll say more than they meant to – even more than they knew they were thinking.It can be surprising and revealing and paves the way for honesty.But if you can both talk honestly about what irritates or upsets you and why, you are more likely to understand each other better.It can feel easier to avoid being honest if we feel that could be hurtful, but it is only with honesty that trust is built, and trust is the essence of a good relationship. There are different qualities to sex at different stages in a long relationship: first, passion; the urgency of reproductive sex; snatched sex in the early years of parenthood; then the slower intimacy of midlife onwards.We tend to jump in with an opinion before we’ve heard each other out.Don’t scream, keep your cool: it makes a big difference.It’s worth going out of your way to have a good laugh, especially if things have been rocky.Go to a place where you used to laugh or where there’s a good chance of laughter.